Objective

So, I haven't really established an objective for this blog.

I'm continuing this blog for two reasons: 1.) For a computer literacy class 2.) To share my adventure in trying to return to India.

Now, back to the topic at hand.

I just sent out the visa application, AGAIN. This is the third time I've done it. Apparently, I've gotten it wrong the rest of the times. So hopefully, I didn't mess up THIS copy of my visa application. I've spent approximately... $60 worth of overnight mailing. Ugh.

I've still yet to decide whether I am to go to college right away or take a gap year. Of course, the family has a strong opinion and wants me to go to college right off the bat. For me, I feel like I need a break from all this chaos and work to just breathe and figure out what I am going to do in life. So, we'll see how that goes. Either way, life will lead me back to India. India is calling me back.

Trying to figure out my plans when I go to India. The idea of possibly searching for a music school in India is appealing. My Tabla teacher has thrown that idea at me too. He is willing to train me and ready me for college level Tabla. I'm not sure if I should be excited by the prospect of it or just plain scared out of my mind. I would probably attend music school later in life though, not now. I guess the reason why I say "later" is because going to a music school in India not only entails me learning intense Tabla (which at one point I practiced 6-9 hours a day when I was there) but it's also the matter of language and how I will have to learn Hindi.

I am not fluent in Hindi. I know enough HIndi. But I am better at the home state language that I learned (Gujarati). I understand Gujarati more than I understand Hindi. So, trying to learn Hindi on top of doing some intense training of the Tabla is just too much at this point. Hence, that will be a "later in life" endeavor I'll pursue when I am ready.

I'm getting another job this summer to make some money for the trip. Let's see how this all turns out.

Tata. =)

Visa

I applied for my visa. =)

I am not leaving for India for a while, but I want to get my visa early. I guess I wanted to get it to remind myself of what lays ahead of me.

I've contacted many in India. They are all awaiting my arrival now. I can't wait to see them.

To the people who have been abroad and established a life elsewhere:

It's hard, no? To be back in America? It's almost been a year since I've been back and I still am made fun of for my little Indian mannerisms. I talk to my friends in India as much as I can. I want to make sure they know that I haven't forgotten about them. I wish that I could contact them more. (Some of them don't have Facbook).

It's weird to live life here, go to school and have friends here as life in India still continues. It's become apparent to me now that time will not stop and wait for me. My friends will move on to college soon (in India.) And I'll just come to India for a little amount of time to see the end result of a year apart.

I miss India more and more as I write about it.

Mera Dil Hindustani Hai

It's almost been a year since I've blogged.

But, my heart still lays in India. My eyes want to see what my heart yearns.

I want to see mango trees again. Rickshaw drivers. I want to see my friends dance in colorful attire in circles during Navratri. I want to see colored powder thrown in my face for Holi. I want to see kites flown in Surat once more as the sunset bursts in the sky. I want to see Camels on the street again. I want to see the back waters of Kerala. The great Himalayas and live in Dharamsala. I want to see the Taj Mahal and the sun rising in Jailsamer; the golden city.

After all this time. I still miss it. Because here I am, stuck in the conformity of this consumer wasteland that is the American dream. The vicious cycle that everybody, at one point in there life has realized, but have chosen to ignore. Getting into debt at a young age, then going to school, finding a job to pay off that debt, then the mortgage, then the car, then you have kids, and they go through the same thing.

Is it a crime if I want to live?

Break free and fly.

Boundless to find the possibilities that can be my life.

I can almost grace the thin line between my reality and dream. It's tangible.