Sleepless Nights...

It's 2am here and I have been unable to really fall asleep for a couple of days now.

Navratri is going on now. It's a nine day festival here, full of dance and fun. It's really nice, just very exhausting. I am getting better at Garba, one of the dances they do, it's really cool. People really get into it. =)


I am starting to become an Indian. I am living, breathing, eating, sleeping, speaking and living in this wonderful culture. On top of that, my English(speaking) is getting worse...=D That's a good thing. My English accent is going away and I am speaking less and less English each day. I literally have to concentrate really hard when I do speak English now... I understand a lot more that is going on around me. I feel good now. I am not confused anymore, and if I ever am, it's not really that hard for me to accept. It's would be bad otherwise if I did deny all the confusion because then I would get no where.

I guess you could say that I am homesick, but, I knew this was coming. Been gone for more than two months now and finally getting use to idea of me being here. At the same time, it's really hard to concentrate being here at times, just because I have a life in America as well, that has not halted just because I left. Life goes on, there and here in India. My friends and My family are still living their lives and I won't really be there for a lot of things in their lives.

Another thing I really miss is karate. I knew I would. I feel like this is a test. I am alone when I do karate, completely. My Dojo is not here with me. So, I just close my eyes, and move. I do karate with my eyes closed at times, just to soak it up even more when I do karate. I've always had it in my life, and I don't plan on leaving it behind just because I have left my physical dojo and instructors as well. It's okay though. I do karate by myself. It's nice to step outside and not have anybody there to give you feedback, gives me the challenge of realizing what I am doing myself and not paying attention to anything else. To concentrate my breathing, my energy, my mind and body. I am starting to think that this might just be what I needed in my training...

Reminiscing does not help homesickness, I know. But just had to get it out. I am still living in the here and now. Still can't believe that I am here in India... Just blows my mind. I have been here for more than two months, and I am still stunned that I am here. I really am... It's a great feeling to be here, you have no idea, it really is. It's a dream come true.

I miss you all. Hope all is well at home...